I’ve moved. Please come on over to my new virtual home.

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I’m blogging over here these days.

http://saxont.wordpress.com/

Whoosh – did you see that?!

A colleague of mine once summed up the – as you get older, life gets faster syndrome – in the following way:

Divide one year (1) into your age and get a percentage.

EG. 1 into 5 years old. 20% of your life.

1 into 40 years old. 2.5% of your life.

I think that is a very salient way to explain how years go by faster and faster yet when you were young it seemed to take FOREVER for Christmas to roll around.

Why are you telling me?

I’m letting you know because I am moving across to my NEW blog and can’t promise that I will post here much , if at all, in the future. Why? Life has gotten in the way. Busy job, two kids & a family and being honest with myself that I just can’t squeeze it ALL in. (As the bishop said to the volleyball team) I’m not shutting Alternate takes on the Everyday down because there are some posts I loved writing here but this will likely be the last new post per se.

However…

…in MUCH better news I’m posting over on my new blog. I’m absolutely loving creating Saxon Templeton. Content Creator with a focus on photography and travel but I promise there will be randomness a plenty too. That’s what I do  – what with being dropped on my head in the baptism font n’ all.

So please come on over and have a look. I will have the kettle on and there’s a comfy seat in front of the fire.

Hope to see you there and as mentioned no need to rush away. Have a look around. I’m still paying the rent here.

Cheers Saxon

To put this post in perspective…

Utter ship! Has ‘journalism’ sunk to a new low?

I’m one of those oldskool cats that flicks through a newspaper every once in a while. I know, I know, how very 1998 of me. In truth it’s normally when I go to a local cafe for lunch and there is an assortment of newspapers to peruse as I munch. However I’m going to need to rethink this activity for safety’s sake I think as I nearly choked on my overpriced risotto.

What left me aghast was what passes for journalism these days! I have to say that I’m starting to think that the historical figure of Saint Benedict was on to something when around 1500 years ago he decided to duck into an Italian cave and pretty much remain there. Two things about that…

  1. How visionary and…
  2. I wasn’t aware that the The Herald Sun newspaper was available in Italy in the 500s.

OK so I pick on them but really this post is about all media that are so oft to use the dumbing-down quip ‘to put that in perspective…’

You can really translate that more appropriately as

‘we think that you are collectively so unintelligent that we’ve needed to dumb this down to the point of comparing it to the number of swimming pools that it would take to fill it or the amount of football fields that would fit in it…’

Then it happened…

Yesterday was the (journalistic) straw that broke the camel’s back…or to put that in perspective when I say camel think of a horse with a piece of Toblerone on its back.

When I saw the shape of a ship tipped high and dry in the midst of a large metropolitan city (image above) my first thought was obviously – hello has the Captain of the Costa Concordia got a new job? But no a new Australian naval ship has been compared to the second highest building in Melbourne, Australia. Of course it has! Clearly either the building was going to have to be laid out flat or the ship tilted 90 degrees. In what was likely to be a tense press-room scene with the stakes high, and an editor-in-chief under pressure to deliver cutting edge copy even higher, tipping the ship to the vertical got the nod. Brilliant…

To put this blog in perspective.

Thanks for reading this post and dropping by my blog. To put my blog in perspective I have had almost 9000 views over the journey. That is the same as having one reader placed every metre up the side of Mt Everest.

Oh as the nun said to the baseball team…

I do so love a witty pun or a cheeky double entendre in a headline & to me the UK’s 4th Estate are probably the best exponents of this pithy practice. Infact they are so much the masters of the play-on-words art that there is probably a touch of Headline Hubris about them. Now, with that now on the record I guess that’s why I dislike the headline pictured above so much…

Tahiti agents look nice

Hmmm… I kept looking for some humorous or clever double meaning for the word ‘nice’. Did it refer to Nice in France perhaps or was it was the name of the hotel or was it the organiser’s surname or…? Sadly, but in equal measure, very interestingly, it turns out I was looking forlornly. No it just means, quite literally – the agents look nice. Fair enough however I’d be expecting that a little more from a story about a princess written by my daughter and less from an adult journalist in a widely read industry e-newsletter.

A prince of prose, a doyen of description or a headline hero they’re not! Anyhoo…

Here comes the Sun

The Sun ahhhh the Sun. I think you might find something quite appealing down below…

Say Freeze

OK I just noticed something. I have started sorting thru a cosy 18,000 photos or so dating back to 2007 in search of a good shot. I’ll let you know when I find one. But folks I have certainly detected one thing as I virtually sift through my iPhoto library.

I hate having photos taken of myself.

Ohh and doesn’t that just show.

There really is very little woo and a whole lot of wooden in the sampler of shots below. But believe me I could have embedded dozens of others just like these. How could I have imaged such a photo suite of shame & to think I’m in Marketing. Tisk, horror. Must work on my whadda bing! Worst of all is I do actually think to myself – OK yuck a photo so I’ll just slide my hands in my jeans pockets, yes that will look relaxed & street. Hmmm…

Goreme in Turkey. Tall, immovable & frozen in time. And behind me is a hill

Look what's on the menu in St Leon sur Vezere. Crap Saxette

Motionless, attached to the red earth for eons oh & Uluru. (Ayres Rock)

Forget my hands for a second. Why the hell have I got a scarf & a T Shirt on? West Scottish Highlands...

The worst of all. Poignant and scared shitless in equal measure. Even when shot from behind the hands find their sooky photo nest. Castle Stalker, Port Appin.

The Easter Pun challenge – accepted

My mission is – to write the most pun laden Easter advert ever. Your task was – to provide me the service or product to write about…

There were as expected some reasonably left-of-centre suggestions, thank you, and some that would certainly have red flagged on a various law enforcement computers around the world but thanks for all suggestions. (Please see my last post for full details of the challenge) All that considered I have chosen to write my Easter ad on the safe topic of share-brokerage as suggested on Twitter.

Warning! EXTREME pun usage below.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’ll be hopping mad if you miss our Easter SALE.

At Bland & Brothers Sharebrokers we let our actions speak louder than words – so we won’t rabbit on. Eggcept to say that when it comes to share portfolio success you just can’t have all your eggs in one basket.

Image

Many a naive investor with too narrow a portfolio has had wealth hare today yet gone tomorrow. At Bland & Brothers we take the stress out of watching the markets and are the leaders in our field. (Check out our testimonial from Warren Buffet) With our great service our clients’ stay loyal – have you been down right hot crossed before?

So hop to it. Call today. Even if you just want us to cross off some of the reasons why B&B are best and have our competition foiled. We’re sure you’re bound to agree!

You survived! Well done.

Look what I’ve found!! Clever Easter ads.

Below please see what I believe to be a really clever piece of Easter advertising creative. Yay. It can happen. Just Google Kolner Zoo Easter for more info. It’s a great campaign!

Happy Holidays

I would have wished you all Merry Christmas but not sure if it is still politically correct to do so? Wouldn’t wish to offend a religious zealot in East Somalia somewhere.

I’ll be back in 2012 as consistently inconsistent as ever striving to keep on topic but more than likely getting very easily distrac…

Um so anyway…oh yeah. Stay safe & behave or if you can’t then just ensure that there’s no CCTV. See you in 2012!

This trendsmap.com website is groin on me

Now this really is trendy!

Whether you are a Twitter user or not it is undoubted that it is a great gauge of what the general populace are taking an interest in. Ok so that’s the Twitter population but that said there are more than 200,000,000 users worldwide so it’s not insignificant.

However what I particularly like is the real-time trending. What’s a hot topic right now globally, in your country or even your state? Definitely the essential tool-of-trade for any news editor in 2011. Without question news influences Twitter trends but it is also visa versa.

So with this in mind I would like to unveil to you trendsmap.com. A free service that collates real-time Twitter trending by location. Whether you are in news, a blogger or merely nosy like me I present to you your burning issue nirvana.

Trendsmap.com in action.

Below you will see a screen shot of the day after the New Zealand All Blacks rugby team lost their key player (Dan Carter) to injury – out of the Rugby World Cup which they ended up winning regardless. Take a guess as to what part of his body was injured using the the Trendsmap image below.

Dan Carter out of Rugby World Cup with injury.