See here’s where you just don’t get ‘me’ Facebook


This dude is just wrong

This dude is just wrong!!!

Yes I know – you know I’m forty. Yes I know – your advertiser knows I’m probably looking after myself a little better now than I used to. But WOW Mark Zuckerberg how wrong can you get me!?

This guy is sooo scary. Loitering outside what appears to be a toilet door (is it even his house?) with a look on his face that only expensive counselling is going to remove. WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!

On the up side.

As I work in Marketing Facebook has, I guess, actually provided me with the anti-template for my advertisements for the rest of my professional career. Scenario below:

Me: Does what we are about to release resemble in any way THIS? (the Facebook Sponsored Story above)

Marketing Co-ord: Hmm maybe slightly in this way.


Some more high class stuff!

What assets is this advertising?

Are you assets balanced?

Do I have a point or is this a storm in a D cup?

solar panels1Oh pah-lease give men more credit (Thought bubble – big boobs) than that!

Like I’m going to buy more than the three DIY-solar-panel-kits I have already purchased for no reason whatsoever in Australia’s cloudiest capital city. Pathetic! Do you hear.

I take it as an affront (& that’s quite a front) to my intelligence. Do they think sex sells or something – what nonsense!

Caveman advertising.

The example below is my favorite. Oh and hang on haven’t we met before – same girl, different ad?!

I am a fan of erudite prose, pithy nuance & the irony-laced lyrics of Cohen so clearly then I was swept up by the below.

You man? You live Victoria? (Editors note. Well they know I do as it would be geo-targeted by Facebook) You like boobies? Yeah you like boobies. You sign you get samples (Not of boobies)

men vic

…and they get database!! They sell database. You sign, you da boobie!

Sorry for venting but I had to get that off my chest!

The new global evil. With Osama gone ‘expandable’ or ‘roll over’ online ads are now public enemy #1

Infuriating online ads

It’s particularly difficult in this ever digitizing age to know how to best reach your audience. In my opinion, and that’s all this blog is, a banner ad so obtrusive as to gobble up the entire page your potential customer is reading is unlikely to be your digital marketing nirvana

An example of this infuriating technique is displayed in the screenshot above. Whilst I tried to peruse the homepage of one of my favorite newspapers lo and behold the page was engulfed. Cleverly, I thought, the close button was mischievously placed in the top left corner rather than the top right as is more the norm. That bought this ad about an extra two seconds on my screen. Let’s face it, do we close these immediately – most likely yes. Well so do our customers.

Ah the good old days of listing in the yellow pages and occasionally paying for a press ad or two and, if the budget stretched to it, some TV & radio.

If only those Navy Seals could help us