Drum roll pah-lease. And the Award Winner is…

Actually that should more accurately say the Award Winner was

ah the good old days...

ah the good old days…

This is a Japanese restaurant that is located directly across the road from my office and inasmuch gets quite a few lunchtime visits.

Now working in Marketing I have often pondered whether or not, if this was my business, I would keep the award-winning board of glory in place in 2013. One will note that no awards have been received since 2009 and instead winning years have been replaced with just hopeful ‘…s’ hinting at possible future glories?!

Probably the one award I might most think about removing is the ‘Safe Food’ one.

Look dear customer at how safe our food was, um until 2009…

What do you think. Would you keep them?

Simply e-mazing.

Conventional wisdom thought it impossible, yet somehow, somehow dear friends it has happened. Tea Towels just got even cooler & more useful. Infact four times cooler & extra functional. The Gods of Funk have smiled upon us & I expect to see Gotye in the social pages with his e-towel before too long!


4 x more BS!

Ev ‘e’ lution.
In the centuries ahead one can presume that the schoolrooms of the future (can’t even fathom what they might look like) will mark the milestones across the millennia a little something like this…

Fire – Wheel – Printing Press – Industrial Revolution – Automobile – Internet – e-towel – ?

I really feel that this product is a watershed. In fact 4 x the amount of water shed! A steal at only AUD $16


Just can’t get e-nough products from e-cloth

Hats off to these guys – well the opposite actually

What could be done better hair, I mean here?

So I was having a cider with a colleague & friend next to the Salamanca Markets, Hobart, Tasmania. I was in town for a conference for the day job but was off the clock. However dear readers I am never off the clock for Alternate takes…

So as I sipped and observed it appeared to me that the Hats R Us stall might be able to sell a few more headpieces with a subtle tweaking of their sales technique. Amidst a veritable sea of headwear I couldn’t help but ponder – as the sun bore down with some brutality – that it might have actually been a good idea for both of the sales staff to be wearing the product? You know um, a hat. Err the thing you’re supposed to be selling…

Maybe some suggestive-selling shout outs might also have been a good idea? On an island with a wafer thin ozone layer some audible quips targeting the meandering tourists (sans chapeau) may have been in order. Such as:

‘Jeez UV a killer today, ain’t it Mary’


‘pity about that damn ozone hole…’


‘OMG is that Roger Fedora?’

Anyway just saying…

Hurry 241 to China

Siamese tonight anyone?

Carrying China, Spanning the World champions this newspaper advertisement for Air China. Hmmm… sounds very breakable. However what actually drew me to this press ad was the apparent ground-breaking use of conjoined twins. A world first I pondered?

Because these are sooo Siamese Twins right? Definitely joined…


Anyhoo…then I had a thought about how this smiling Air China amalgam may have occurred. You know they pack ’em in tight down the back of the bus so perhaps these two  may have been 54g & 54e before joining to become 54we!

The Bonnie Tilers – Best business name ever?

How grout are The Bonnie Tilers

Behold!!! I have seen this van a couple of times locally but never been able to photograph the darn thing. Finally I passed it on the weekend and now can unfetter their brilliance upon the world.

Look closely.

Look again at the photo above. Now look down. See it? When you look closer it isn’t Bonnie Tyler at all.  See the Genius!

Holding out for a Hero? The Bonnie Tilers

Further monetizing suggestions for the Bonnie Tilers.

(Do your Tiles) Tuuuurn Around? Every now & then…Well call us on 0435 – xxxxxx

Or. Customer in italics

And I need you now tonight (Sorry we finish at 4pm)
And I need you more than ever (OK. That will cost triple)
And if you’ll only hold me tight  (Um, OK awkward)
We’ll be holding on forever  (Well our tiles will)
And we’ll only be making it right (Bad tiles need to go, no two ways)
Cause we’ll never be wrong together (Can we get a reference?)
We can take it to the end of the line (We never leave gaps)
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time (Ummm…)
I don’t know what to do and I’m always in the dark (We do tiles not electrical lady)
We’re living in a powder keg and giving off sparks (Seriously you need an electrian!!)
I really need you tonight (Ok we’ll be there at 7pm)
Forever’s gonna start tonight (Well not forever –technically – we give a five year guarantee)

Love some nuance in my traffic safety advertising


Sorry that this image is a little blurry but I was driving a bit too fast.

Love a dose of pithy handling of a serious subject. So nice to have a chuckle rather than a cringe. It’s more oft to see a limb flying thru a windscreen than a droll play on words.

Good work on this one clever agency peeps!

Would three dollars have killed ya?

Not often you see someone round UP in Travel marketing

Hmmm…not everyday you see this type of marketing. There is a word for it but I’d like to keep this blog PG. Just me or there is an EXCELLENT opportunity here to have this airfare start with a ‘1’!!!

Peeps at Webjet – who ironically enough today announced a tidy profit of $A11 Million – with this type of pricing policy I reckon you may have left a couple of extra possible profit cents in consumers and/or competitors pockets.

I best end for tonight – it’s getting late. It’s 10:57pm. Aw what the hey let’s call it 11:02